Dating in the BOI: 7 Type of Guys On Tinder

I know you’ve heard me talk about Tinder, and let’s not forget my most recent experience with Mr. McNasty. 


These Tinder pitfalls had me think about the type of guys I’ve come across while a single on Tinder. Of course, my list does not paint a general brush of ALL men on Tinder. That would be 1)wrong and 2) unfair to those decent men on Tinder.


Based on my experiences, here are my 7 type of guys you’ll find on Tinder:

  1. GUY WHO ONLY HAS PICTURES OF HIM AND HIS FRIENDS

On the surface, this does NOT seem like a horrible characteristics of a Tinder profile. It is an issue, however, if ALL of the photos are with his friends. I mean, should I have to play HIDE AND SEEK when looking at a profile?

I wonder who the guy is.

No, that’s not what I want to play when I’m already on a dating app.

Makes me wonder if this a strategic move, especially if it appears most of the friends in the photo are relatively attractive.

Or tall.

Or smiling.

Dating in the BOI Tip: It’s normal to have photos of your friends. Just don’t make them ALL of your photos.


2. GUY WITH TOO MANY SELFIES

Nothing is wrong with a selfie — here and there. It’s a whole other ballgame when EACH and EVERY photo is a selfie. Let’s review the type of selfies I’ve seen:

  • Duck face selfie
  • Just-worked-out selfie
  • In-my-car-casually-driving selfie
  • After-shower selfie
  • I’m-trying-but-not-trying selfie

Dating in the BOI Tip: Please don’t bombard your entire Tinder profile to all selfies. It makes it seem you are obsessed wit your looks.


3. GUY WHO STARTS A CONVERSATION TO NOWHERE LAND

I mentioned this in my Guys You Find on POF blog post. It’s basically Mr. Time Suck.  Here’s a typical conversation:

Mr. Nowhere Land: Hey, what’s up?

Me: Nothing much. How are you?

Mr. Nowhere Land: Nothing much.

Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Why start a conversation if CONVERSING is not your purpose.

Dating in the BOI tip: Don’t embark on the journey to nowhere land.


4. GUY WHO MATCHES BUT NO MESSAGE

Unlike Bumble (app allegedly to be female-friendly where the female has to initiate the conversation), the unspoken rule of Tinder is the man initiates the conversation after he matches. It’s intimidating to send a man a message, especially for a woman, because we don’t want to seem like 1) we are CHASING the guy and 2) we seem DESPERATE. I typically give a guy I matched with 2 weeks before I write him off. I’ve had experiences where they haven’t logged into Tinder for a few days or even weeks. I believe this because I do it!

Disclaimer: this is an unspoken rule, and it applies to my heterosexual experiences.

I have PLENTY of idle matches sitting in my Tinder app. And, most likely, they will remain idle.


5. GUY THAT NEVER ACTUALLY WANT TO MEET

There was this one match on Tinder, and he was so eager to meet. He would consistently message me, and I was interested. When it came time to finalize the details, I would get a constant “reschedule” or a “too busy.”

Buddy, really?!

OK, that’s fine by me. I  K.I.M (KEEP IT MOVING) when it comes to these type of guys. If you are not careful, this person will ultimately become a TIME WASTER!


6. GUY WHO ONLY HAS PICTURES WITH OTHER GIRLS

Like with the guy who has only photos with his bros/friends, there is also the guy who only has photos with girls. And these are the photos with NO explanation (for example: my sister, my cousin, etc.). I question some accounts where there is only photo of women because I wonder:

1) is this a couple looking to spice up their love life?

2) does this guy want to brag about his contact with beautiful women?

3) are these past girlfriends he is showing off?

I have no clue. But whatever the reason is, I swipe LEFT. No interest whatsoever.

Dating in the BOI tip: Diversify your photos. More importantly, if you have photos with other women, it’s best to clarify it in your bio. Don’t leave it up for interpretation, unless that’s your point.


7. GUY WHO IS ON REPEAT

Have you ever had to delete & re-download the Tinder app? Yes, I have. I deleted it a few months back, then I re-downloaded it soon thereafter. That said, there has been moments where I have matched…

and matched…

and matched with the SAME GUY.

This situation has occurred multiple times here in Boise!

What’s more comical is that these guys have evolved into #4 above: GUY WHO NEVER MESSAGES.

This  is my take on the 7 most common type of guys I’ve seen on Tinder. There are a few who I haven’t categorized (like Mr. McNasty), but this is a common thread I’ve seen over the course of my time on Tinder!


Do YOU have a horrible Tinder story?

What about a success story?

I’d LOVE to hear it! Send an email to theboisebucketlist@gmail.com.


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Dating in the BOI: Mr. TDH

App used: None

Number of Dates: Zero (not officially) only been messaging & hanging out

Status: ongoing


You know those nights when you go out & you have zero  expectations? Historically, these nights have been some of my best ones.

Mr. TDH (tall, dark & handsome):

  • Dark brown hair
  • Perfect height (for me; at least 6’4)
  • Light brown eyes

How did we met? Simple: in a nightclub.


In addition to online apps, I’m making all efforts to put myself out there, in hopes  to meet someone the more organic way: at a bar or some place where lots of singles congregate.

When I walked into this one popular establishment in Boise, no one really caught my eye. It wasn’t until I was dancing  near the DJ booth where I noticed someone in my peripheral vision.

Ladies (or even gentleman), you KNOW when someone is eyeing you. They tend to stand close to you, but not too close. They may stare at you but not too long. It’s this weird game of “who will speak first.”


After realizing I may have an admirer, I made every effort to play  it cool. I swayed my body to the beat with a little bit more confidence, ran my  hands thru my curly hair a bit more, and may have glanced at my phone to seem distracted 😂


After swatting away a few annoying flies [flies = type of men who 1) wouldn’t go away after multiple efforts to be nice; and 2) keep buzzing in your ear with nonsense like “why you don’t want to dance with me?],  I was finally alone.

I wish I was making this up, but it’s the drawback of going out. You gotta deal with these  situations.

Anyway, back to Mr. TDH.


After dancing solo for a bit, I felt someone’s presence. Thinking it was another fly, I slowly turned to face my right side to say something polite. Before I could even open my mouth to say something, I was greeted by this tall man in a vest.


After he gave me eye contact, he leans over and whispers in my ear  are you single?

Damn, his eyes are so mesmerizing  I thought.

After realizing that he just asked me a question, I quickly answered yes

He then asked are you sure?

Like I would lie about that. I smiled back and answered yes, I’m sure.

Then he asked me to add him on Facebook.

Hmm, am I getting old? Is this now the new thing, asking for FB accounts instead of phone numbers?

I obliged and added him. I’m glad I did because I had access to his other photos (which confirmed he was still TDH even in the light; nightclub goggles  tend to be distorted because of the darkness & maybe with the alcohol. Someone can be attractive in the bar, but once you head outside in the bright light, you’re like 😳😱.


When I saw his birthday on Facebook I was like, OMG I’m a cougar.

After feeling like a cougar (which I’m really not; he is my junior but not by too much of a gap), I realized that maybe I look younger for my age.


Since that initial night, it’s been back and forth messaging. We message each other, maybe hang out, and then not speak for some time.

He’s my type of eye candy, which is refreshing given that I’ve been out of the dating scene for some years (yes, I said years).


Where do I see this going?

Honestly, I don’t know. I enjoy talking to Mr. TDH about random things when we hang out, but no emotions are invested. There’s no “good morning” texting and long phone calls. No meeting of family members. No date nights. Just fun.


And that leads me to conclude with this: dating — whether in the BOI or in any other market — the dater’s intent can be heavily influenced by the local culture & norms.

Sure, some people date for the primary purpose of getting married. But where I’m from (south Florida), that isn’t necessarily the culture. People date just to date, have fun, and feel as though s/he has options. It wasn’t until I moved to New England where I experienced a culture shock. Almost everyone in my age bracket was 1) in a long-term relationship, 2) engaged, or 3) married. A lot of college sweethearts. That was the first time in my life where I felt old & self-conscious about not being in the position for marriage.


Fast forward to now, I’m dating to explore Boise. Not to overshare, but my most recent relationship was hard. The breakup was even harder. We lived together, talked about marriage, and were even engaged. With him already having a young child from another relationship, that was the first time in my life I felt like I was creating my own family.

Then boom — shit happens.

I’m now here in Boise and embracing the dating scene. I’m dating for the enjoyment of 1st dates, trying new places, blogging about horror stories. I told myself that after my recent heartache, I didn’t have the energy to fully invest in another person , at least not right now. I only have enough energy for myself, committing to my needs, and making myself happy.


Back to Mr. TDH.

I have no clue where this will lead. I simply enjoy the fact he approached me with confidence, never been rude to me when we hang out (so far), and made me feel like I was the only woman in the nightclub that night. Which was a sexy feeling I haven’t felt in some time.


Read my other Dating Stories in the BOI here.

Do you have any dating stories? I’d love to hear them!

BEER-ific Review: Top 3 Things of Boise Brewing

Last night, I checked out Boise Brewing for the 1st time. Although craft beers weren’t as popular in South Florida while I was living there, I picked up this interest in the craft brew scene when I lived in Maine.

Disclaimer: I am not a beer connoisseur whatsoever. That said, I don’t necessarily judge the craft beers based off substance. Some critics have mentioned to me breweries are all the same.


Uhh, no not really.

How I view going to breweries is that it’s an experience, because I usually:

  • Take my time to review the menu (if you’re a newbie like me)
  • Check out the decor
  • Interact with the server, asking for suggestions
  • Hang out in the tasting room
  • Take a brewery tour (if available)
  • Hang out with friends, co-workers, boyfriend (when I had one), or like yesterday — young professionals of Boise

Based on yesterday’s visit, here’s my BEER-ific review of Boise Brewing:

 

  1. Private Room is worth a visit: I was impressed on how quaint and comfortable the private room was. It comfortably fits 30+ people, fair share of places to sit (including a ledge with a view of downstairs), and a staircase with a straight shot to the bar. That’s always a win. If you’re thinking about a cozy place for a gathering, whether it’s for your office or group of friends, I suggest you checkout Boise Brewing’s private area upstairs.
  2. Active Calendar of Events. As I mentioned above, part of my brewery experience is checking out the decor and my surroundings. While waiting for the lovely server to prepare my pint of Broad Street Blonde, I used that time wisely to look around the bar. My eye caught the attention of the bright Yellow and Blue calendar of events for December. Below are some of the events listed:
    • Frequent Food Truck visits (I have a thing for food trucks!) by Westos Locos, B-Town Bistro and Rusty Dog
    • Free Comedy Night
    • Daily Happy Hour specials

Time to mark my calendar!!

3. Responsible for annual Hoptober Freshtival I’m pretty bummed that when I first moved to Boise, I wasn’t aware of this FRESHtival. Otherwise, I would have attended and scratched it off my #boisebucketlist.

Oh well. There’s always next year.

According to their website, over 60 fresh hop and season beers from 30+ local/regional craft breweries are featured. Over 2,000 (yes 2K) patrons attend each year.


 

I plan on going next week to take advantage of the $1.00 off the featured food truck.

Have you checked out Boise Brewing? What are your thoughts? I’d love to know!!

 

 

Dancing in the BOI

Last Saturday I did my usual: Hulu binged on some BravoTV show. As the evening approached, I felt the need to get out of the apartment — the need to dance, that is.
With all this talk about snow and cold temps, you would think this would deter me of wanting to head to Boise on a Saturday night. Nope, not at all.  Get some fresh air and an excuse to put on my dancing shoes.


Here’s an overview of my night out in the BOI:
Stop 1: Fatty’s

Fatty’s is located on 8th Street, near Pie Hole, on the 2nd floor. Lately, this has been my warm-up/ starting point. When I start my night, I usually check out Fatty’s drinks specials (fireball shots, anyone?), grabs some shots, head to the dance floor, and start vibing to the music.


Cover: None

Themed Nights & Drink Specials

  • Tuesday Night Beer Pong Tournament
  • Wednesday Ladies Night with Wild 101
  • Fawesome Thursdays (EDM Night)
  • Fatty Friday’s with Wild 101
  • Saturday with DJ Zuz
  • Hip Hop Sundays with 208 Music

Thinking about going to Fatty’s? Here are some tips:

1. Check out the stripper pole. Yes, there’s a stipper pole surrounded by 2 couches. If you feel so inclined to show off your Magic City moves (ladies) or Magic Mike skills (men), by all means go ahead and abuse that pole!
2. Don’t miss your chance to meet the Fatty’s panda. He fittingly  pops up when the DJ drops Desiigner’s “Panda.” Crowd usually goes crazy for Mr. Panda. Make sure to snap a photo with him.


3. It’s for all ages. Let’s say you’re just coming from a Steelheads game. Head over to Fatty’s to end the night by hanging by the bar. Date night? Fatty’s is ideal because it has private booths to sit in, bar stool tables, a pool table. You can find places to talk in Fatty’s. Girls’ Night Out? Yes, also ideal. I scanned the crowd, and I can see all demographics and age groups.


Stop 2: China Blue

After warming up a little bit at Fatty’s, I made the walk over to China Blue. China Blue is a 2-story dance floor on the corner of Main Street and 6th Street.  Once you get carded and walk thru the curtains (yes, there are curtains), you’re greeted with vibrant bar. Once you take a right, you can either checkout the main dance floor, or you can head upstairs for more intimate setting.


Thinking about going to China Blue? Here are some tips:

  1. Embracing your dancing shoes. The DJ normally plays a mix of hip hop and top 40 hits. Sometimes, I wish the DJ would let certain hip hop/rap songs play out. He usually mixes a hip hop song with some techno version. Maybe it’s the Floridian in me, but if you’re feeling a good hip hop song, changing gears isn’t always what the crowd wants.
  2. Make it a Girl’s Night/Guy’s Night Out. China Blue is ideal for a large group for a variety of reasons: 1) you can all chip in for VIP section; 2) you can dominate the dance floor; and 3) you have your fair share of wing(men/women).
  3. Checkout the outside deck. Although it’s reserved for smokers, and if you can handle the smoke, I encourage you to checkout outside. Nice view of downtown Boise, a few comfy seats, and a warm fire pit.

Bonus is the Ladies bathroom. It’s its own mini lounge! It has modern sinks, a coat check, seats, large mirrors — ideal for outfit check, selfies, and SnapChats.

Oh, did I mention they have “Make It Rain” Friday? Yes, dolla dolla bills are dropped from the 2nd floor to the ground. Confetti is simultaneously released into the crowd as the money drops. When does China Blue make it rain? Friday nights.


Stop 3:  Humpin’ Hannahs

Not many words can describe Humpin’ Hannah’s. But I’ll try. I first visited a couple of months ago for a Meetup group event. It reminded me of a dive bar I used to visit with my classmates in law school in Maine. From the decor to the music, it’s your ideal place to get to dance, play pool, and enjoy you night out in the BOI.


Cover: None

Themed Nights & Drink Specials

  • Wednesday: Blue Turf Bash
    • $2.50 wells & bottled buds
    • $5 Doc Holiday and Huckleberry Lemonades
  • Throwback Thursday
    • $2 Coors and Wells
  • Friday & Saturday Night: all out dance party

Thinking about going to Humpin’ Hannah’s? Here are some tips:

  1. Be close to Rocci Johnson when she & her band performs. Rocci is a staple in the Boise community. Her band covers all type of songs, from rock & roll to pop hits. She’s also known for giving away adult toys! Let her know it’s your birthday, bachelorette party, or any special occasion, and she’ll spoil you!
  2. Go early. To my surprise (which now is no longer a surprise given Humpin Hannah’s has been ranked  #1 as Treasure Valley’s Best Dance Club), there’s a line to get in. That said, pay attention to who is in front & whether people skip the line.
  3. You will find a dancing partner. Don’t worry if it’s you and a few friends. You will eventually be asked to dance & have a dancing partner. The dance floor is usually packed to capacity, with a large screen for music videos as the song plays. It’s a recipe for the ultimate dancing experience. Whether you’re dancing with a group of girls, a group of guys, or someone on an intimate level — you will be dancing with someone by the end of the night!

If you’re not really into the whole dancing-all-night thing, Hannah’s has plenty of places to sit (upstairs and downstairs). You can enjoy all the people watching too. You can also enjoy a game of pool with your friends.


 

So that was my #boisebucketlist night out! I have plenty more clubs and bars to try out and feature. Once I do, I’ll have my top 5 nightclubs which should be on your #boisebucketlist.

Before I go, here are a couple of funny stories from my night out:

  1. Free Drinks! While I was waiting in line at Humpin’ Hannah’s, a young lady and her boyfriend came up to me and said I will buy you a drink if I can cut in front of you? Because I was with my brother, we negotiated 2 drinks to be bought. Apparently, it was 1) her birthday and 2) she couldn’t handle the Boise cold given that she was from Seattle. So, after I let her cut in front of me, we headed to the $1.00 shots mini table, cheer to her birthday, and kicked off our time in Humpin’ Hannah’s

  1. Mini Stalker. OK, this is pretty funny but also not. I was recognized at Humpin Hannah’s by someone from when I went out with my sister during Thanksgiving holiday. This person is drastically shorter than me (5 inches shorter). His aggressive nature was tolerable when I was at Humpin’ Hannah’s. He must have followed me to China Blue because not even 5 minutes in China Blue, I see mini stalker. He comes up to me without hesitation and tries to grab me. My patience wore thin at this point, and I forcely told him to stop. Thankfully, it didn’t need to be escalated.

Side note: Although I consider this something funny, please don’t take an aggressor lightly. I commend all the security guards at the bars/nightclubs I’ve visited here in Boise. These men are there to help diffuse and prevent a situation in the nightclub. In my case, if this mini stalker kept harassing me, I would have no problem going to one of the security guards and advise them of this guy’s behavior.

 


Quick Recap:

  • No covers for Fatty’s, China Blue, and Humpin’ Hannah’s
  • Drink specials at each location
  • All 3 places seem to have all ages atmosphere
  • Bars close at 2aM

Till next time Boise!