#boisebucketlist adventures

Love in the BOI: Jean & Rexx

In honor of National Love Your Pet Day, today’s Love in the BOI feature is dedicated to our special furrrbabies. Meet  Jean Slade (IG: wingbeanjean ) & Rex Slade (IG: rexxontheroad )

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How Did You Meet?

We met, 3 years ago, from the Idaho Small Dog & Chihuahua Rescue, a local organization that helps place smaller dogs with forever homes in Boise.
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Describe Your First Meeting (puppy date?)

 I saw an ad on Facebook that the organization had recently acquired several pups from a hoarder situation and they needed help. I went to go donate some items and Rex instantly started playing with me (and my other dog). The organizer looked at me and said “This is your dog, I just have this feeling, and you have to adopt him”.  I was not in the market for a new dog but I left that day with Rex and it was the best decision I ever made.
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What is Your Advice for Others Looking for Pet Love Here in Boise?

 Find an animal to rescue.. it’s fuuurever love 🙂
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What Are Your Favorite Things To Do In Boise?

We  love Ann Morison park in the winter because it is off-leash and there are so many great pups! During the summer its trail runs and rafting!
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Love in the BOI: Mallory & Tommy

In 2014, Mallory went to the Mayhem Festival. Although since she was young she knew she would meet her future husband at a concert, Mallory probably didn’t know it would be this one! Meet Mallory and Tommy.

mallory 1


 How did you all meet?

We met at Mayhem Festival in 2014! It was too perfect because growing up, I always knew I would meet my future husband at a concert!

 


Describe your first date

Our first date was at Barbacoa and we shared a rack of ribs and their roasted marshmallow dessert

 


What advice do you have for those looking for love in Boise?

For those looking for love in Boise, I advise that you look in places where you least expect it. Branch out and get out of your comfort zone! Maybe attend a class that you haven’t been to before.

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Where is your favorite place to go (or thing to do) together as a couple?

Our favorite thing to do as a couple is eat out! We LOVE food and Boise has so many amazing local restaurants and brew pubs to offer. We try to eat at a new place every week!​

 


Thank you, Mallory for sharing your LOVE in the BOI story!

 

Love in the BOI: Erika & Ray

 

Meet Erika & Ray.  Ray traveled to Spain to study Spanish, while Erika was in Spain volunteering to show Americans around. Their love for one another & Erika’s love for Boise lead to be a Love in the BOI story. 

erika 1

 


 

How did you all meet?

Back in 2010 Ray was studying  Spanish so he decided to study abroad in Spain. I was studying English so I decided to become a volunteer and help American students to integrate in my    city and show them around.  Ray was one of those American students. I had never met such a joyful person and we became best friends. Soon enough we fell in love and I decided to come to USA to keep studying English.
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We had a long distance relationship for 18 months until he finished college. After graduation,  we traveled the world together and lived in Colombia, Spain and Russia.  In 2015 we got engaged and he said : We can live anywhere in the world you want. I answered : Let’s go to Boise!
I had fallen in love with Boise since the very first day I visited it and here we have had the happiest days of our relationship.


Describe Your First Date.


Our first date was at my favorite beach in my Island  (Mallorca ).
We jumped cliffs and listened to Johnny Cash in the Ipod. I had always loved Johnny Cash but pretty  much no one knew him in Spain. When he chose Johnny Cash in the playlisy and imitated his voice , I knew I had found the one.
 erika 2

 

What advice do You Have for those looking for love in Boise?

 

Try and find a partner in a place where a similar interest exists that will build your relationship over time: book shops, concerts, climbing gyms, fitness classes, etc. Bars are a natural go to, but the atmosphere often times doesn’t reflect an environment of “looking for something serious”.

And for people from around the area who think they already know everyone here, don’t lose hope! Boise is attracting droves of young people as of recently and there could be someone new coming to town just for you.

 



What is your favorite place to go (or thing to do) together as a couple? 

We love skying , taking interesting classes at Jump, enjoying the great outdoors and eating amazing food ! Our favorite places  are El Cafetal Colombian restaurant,  Wild Root, Parilla, and Bier 30. Oh and we love traveling!

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Love in the BOI: Sarah & Zac

Imagine only being able to communicate with each other in a beginner’s American sign language class. This is Sarah & Zac’s Love in the BOI story.

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Zac & Sarah Warren

How did you all meet?

We were paired up during a beginner’s American sign language class in college and weren’t allowed to actually speak to each other those first few weeks – just awkwardly try to sign.


Describe your first date.

We met in Vancouver, WA, but one of the first things we did together as a couple was come to Boise to meet Zac’s mom and great-grandmother. It was a bit intimidating for me, but I ended up loving his family and we had such a good time exploring the city. We were married in the Idaho State Capitol and when we started our family we decided that Boise was the place we wanted to live. It was one of the best decisions we’ve ever made!


What advice do you have for those looking for love in Boise?

Our advice for people looking for love in Boise is that it comes when you least expect it. Pursue your dreams and passions and you are bound to run into that special someone.


What is your favorite place to go (or thing to do) together as a couple?

Our favorite thing to do as a couple is travel. We have a goal of taking our son to all 50 states and 7 continents! We also love camping at Redfish Lake.

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Zac & Sarah Warren (photo by Maggie Grace Photo)

 

Want to follow Zac and Sarah on their adventures? Make sure to give them a “follow” on their Instagram pages: Zac @zacwarren56 and Sarah @raisingsmiles. Photo credit to Maggie Grace at @maggiegracephoto.

sarah & zac

Love in the BOI: Nikki & Graham

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The Night Nikki & Graham Met

 

Imagine backpacking through Europe & eventually meeting your future husband. Meet Nikki and Graham.


Nikki’s Mini Story:

I was 24 had a great job, lived down town. Done with dating. And thought right! If I’m going to see the world I need to do it now before I have roots. I sold my stuff, and my flat. Bought a ticket to London and traveled by train for 7 weeks, sleeping on couch’s hostels, hotels, and streets. I saw the U.K., France, Germany, Switzerland, Italy, and made my way back to London and up to Scotland
For my 25th birthday. the girl I was crashing with had a going away party me at the end of my stay and invited a few friends. She said we needed to pick up a friend from the train station, there he was 6’2 Scotsman. Awesome fashion smaller amazing ! I played it cool. We all hung out all night. And he kissed me before I had to go, We swapped details, and said to keep in touch. I touch a 5 hour train back to London. And no sooner I got there, he said come back. I had one of those movie moments ( if I don’t go I’ll regret it for the rest of my life) and so I went. He took me all over, had a few adventures. And I had to fly back to Boise.

Two days after I got home he sent me a message “ I shouldn’t have let you leave” and he was on the next flight, he had NEVER been to America. I took him all over Boise, Salt Lake, Reno, Las Vegas. And that was it….

6 weeks from the day we met, we were married ️ that was nearly 8 years ago. We lived in Scotland for a while. But Boise is home. We have 2 kids both with Scottish names Ewan Graham, and Harper Caroline. Which we take traveling. Hawaii, Iceland, Disneyland and Scotland

How Did You Meet?

I was backing thru Europe, met him in Scotland.
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Nikki & Graham the 1st Night They Met

Describe Your First Date

I had to leave Scotland and head back to London. And we had said our ( nice to meet you, keep in touch) . Once back in London, he said he wanted to see me and told me to come back. And he would take me on a tour of his country (Scotland) our first date was in a pub in Edinburgh, the start of a 3 day tour.

What Advice Do You Have for Those Looking for Love in Boise?

Stop looking lol!. As soon as I said “screw men” , and focused on what I wanted to do( travel) he found me.
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Nikki & Graham on Their Wedding Day

Where is Your Favorite Place to Go (or thing to do) Together as a Couple?

We love to eat!! So we live trying every hole in the wall restaurant in town. And traveling .. of course

 

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First Time at Table Rock

Nikki shared more after this post about the details surrounding her marriage. It’s pretty epic! Let’s just say it involves a bet in Sin City. Checkout Nikki’s Instagram feed, where she showcases her veggie-inspired lifestyle.

Love in the BOI: Vanessa & Brody

 

Meet Brody and Vanessa Wright. This is their Boise love story told by Vanessa.

vanessa
Vanessa & Brody Wright

How They Met:

I was living in Pocatello at the time. My friend wanted to leave town to celebrate her birthday so we decided to head to Boise for the weekend! Brody and I met downtown boise off 6th and main, in the middle of the street! We stopped on that corner to exchange numbers, and later met up the next day! That following night, He showed me around Boise and I fell in love with the atmosphere even more.

We have been inseparable ever since. After 4 months into our relationship and long distance, I finally took the step to move to Boise to pursue our going relationship. A year later, we got engaged, and a year after that, we got married . We now have a beautiful daughter, Moana who is 6 months. We will be together for 4 years this coming March, 2 year wedding anniversary in June ❤️🤗

vanessa 4
Meet the Wrights 

Describe Your First Date:

He offered to come visit me in Pocatello for our first actual date. We had breakfast at a place called “Butterburrs” and I was pretty shy! I refused to look him straight in the eye during our date because he was so intimidating! He thought I wasn’t interested in him! We attempted a second date the following weekend. Second date kicked off much better! And he continued to come down to see me every weekend for 4 months until I moved. Been together ever since ❤️


What Advice Do You Have For Those Looking for Love in Boise?

My advice for those looking for love in Boise is HAVE FUN, live a little and don’t have such high standards!!!! I honestly did not plan on being in a relationship so soon when I met my husband. But that’s what life does to you! People show up at the right place and the right time!

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Beautiful smiles from a lovely couple

Before, I used to be so picky, but being picky isn’t always a good thing! Once I realized what was actually realistic in a man/relationship, the more fun it became to meeting people!! I never thought I’d meet my husband in the middle of the street! I took that as a sign and opportunity to see what would happen next!

So have fun, take chances, and live life with a positive outlook!! Always!


What we enjoy doing as a couple:

We LOVE sushi! You’ll catch us at your local IOU Sushi, or outdoors paddleboarding, or hiking with our German shepherd named Kuma and our daughter Moana around the valley! We also enjoy The Village at Meridian, and Bowling at Big Al’s with family and friends!

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Vanessa & Brody’s  outside adventures 

 

Vanessa also has a YouTube channel where she does amazing makeup tutorials. Her Instagram is an amazing feed of her family, friends, and her beauty tutorials. I tease her sometimes on Instagram to help teach me some amazing makeup tricks! Make sure to follow her at @vanessamwright.

Love in the BOI: Sladja & Devin

 

 

To celebrate the month of love, I asked local couples to share their stories of how they fell in love in the City of Trees.

Meet Sladja & Devin. Here’s their BOI Love Story:

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How did you and Devin meet?

We met at a friends’ wedding; my friend Catalina and his friend Gabe were getting married. He approached me on the dance floor and complimented my outfit. We talked the remainder of the evening and exchanged phone numbers; he asked first of course.


Describe Your First Date.

Our first date was very simple and casual, my style. We went out to dinner to Matador, a local Mexican joint. We realized later that both of our favorite food was Mexican. We barely ate but instead talked for 2 hours getting to know one another. After dinner, we went to his place and watched a movie. We were inseparable from that moment on.


What advice do you have for those looking for love in Boise?

Don’t be so picky, but don’t settle either. What I mean by this is lose your “type” or the idea of a “perfect” person because it will limit who you meet based on your own judgement but don’t allow your character to be questioned based upon what you think the other person will like. Believe your worth because there’s only one of you and every person deserves love. People often, myself included, confuse lonely and alone. If you feel lonely, you’re better off being alone. I also truly believe you have to love yourself first before you can love someone else and allow them to love you back.


Where is your favorite place to go (or thing to do) together as a couple?

We love to go anywhere outdoors. We love to hike and/or backpack with our pups through the wilderness; one of our favorite spots is Stanley, ID. It’s one of our favorite ways to unwind and disconnect from the hustle and bustle of work and social media stress. For us, it’s the best way to spend quality time together and go back to basics.

 

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Sladja & Devin with their fur babies 

FYI – I enjoy Sladja’s instagram page and been following her for some time. I was even behind her in line when Bleu Bird Cafe closed a few weeks back. Make sure to give Sladja  a follow!


Do you have a Love in the BOI story? Feel free to email me at theboisebucketlist@gmail.com.

Football at Albertson Stadium

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People don’t think of Idaho as much of a sports haven. There’s not a noteworthy professional team in the state, and indeed this entire region of the country is fairly light on professional sports. But in a way, that makes the sports that are popular even more exciting. After all, Nebraska – another state that’s not generally associated with major sports – is thought to have a fan base that makes up one of the loudest groups in the nation. Boise State can’t quite make that kind of claim – but it does have a very strong football tradition that’s worth getting into if you’re in town.

That football tradition may actually be harder to notice in the greater United States than it was just a few years ago. That’s because of the College Football Playoff, which has taken focus away from traditional bowl games and put the spotlight on the top four teams in the country in any given year. For instance, last year we saw a national championship match-up pitting Alabama against Clemson – the team they beat to claim the 2015 title. That’s the kind of repetition people are used to at the very top of the game, and it means schools like those two, Ohio State, Oklahoma, and a small handful of others are traditionally going to be viewed as the best of the best.

Just a few years ago, however, Boise State was known as a perennial presence in national debate over premiere bowl games. From 2006-2012 the team amassed a cumulative record of 84-8, going undefeated twice and finishing with just one loss on three separate occasions. Those were the kinds of seasons that earned consideration for top bowl games, and still do – just not necessarily in the College Football Playoff.

All that is to say that this is a truly top-notch football program, despite belonging to a town not known for spectator sports. That alone is a good reason to check out a game if you get the chance, because the best college football experiences are always those that involve proud fans and program traditions. But the stadium itself also factors in.

Located right on Boise River and essentially across from the zoo, Albertsons Stadium is in a great spot, and a fairly easy one to find and navigate. It’s a modern stadium with great seating, satisfying food and beverage options, and droves of enthusiastic fans that provide a strong sense of atmosphere. Most famously, it’s also home to “The Blue,” the world’s first blue Astro Turf field and arguably the key identifying feature of the program. It’s a little bit difficult to explain how, but The Blue seems to foster a greater sense of unity among fans, and even between those fans and the team itself. It also make the stadium feel that much more unique at all times, and particularly during an evening game when the lights are shining down upon it.

All in all it’s a great thing to do in town, and something visitors and locals alike should consider!

16 Holiday Activities to Cross Off Your Boise Bucket List

 

holiday activiites top list

If you are like me a year ago, I didn’t know what to do when it came to my first holiday season in Boise. For those who are new to Boise, or if you’re looking for a few new ideas, here’s my Top 16 Holiday Activities to Cross Off Your Boise Bucket List:

 

1. Capital Tree Lighting on the Grove Plaza

lighting tree Idaho Statesman

Date: November 24th, from 5pm -6:30pm. 

Get ready to snuggle with your loved ones as you enjoy the holiday tree lighting. It’ll be held at The Grove, and festivities begin at 5pm. Entertainment by Red Light Challenge and the Boise Men’s & Women’s Choruses.

For full details, please visit: https://downtownboise.org/events/downtown-holiday-tree-lighting 


2. Wintry Market at JUMP Boise

wintry market
Source: Wintry Market

Date: November 18 & 19; 10am – 5pm; Pioneer Room at JUMP Boise

Looking to find some homemade goodies you can give as gifts? The 2017 Wintry is here and will be held at JUMP.  The market will be open and free to the public this Saturday and Sunday from 10am – 5pm.


3. Saint Alphonsus Festival of Trees


Date: November 22nd – November 28th.

Last year, I attended this wonderful event and I highly recommend it. For so many reasons. All funds raised will support the expansion of Saint Alphonsus. You get to walk around and be surrounded by all of the holiday splendor that makes you feel warm inside. Let’s not forget the hundreds of decorated Christmas trees, wreaths, and holiday decor.


4. Idaho Food Bank Empty Bowls

Source: Boise Bucket List/Instagram

Date: Friday, November 24; 11am – 2pm; Grove Plaza

It’s the 20th anniversary of the Idaho Food Bank Empty Bowls! The Empty Bowls is where you get to choose from hand-painted bowls from professional and amateur painters, students, and studios.  After you select a bowl, you can then enjoy a hot bowl of soup generously donated by one of the local Boise restaurants.

Over 3,000 bowls to choose from, and bowls start at $10.00.  It’ll be held at the Boise Center. *Parking WILL BE FREE on Friday.

Recommendation: ARRIVE EARLY! I made the terrible mistake of attending around 12pm. The line was long, wrapped around Main Street.


5. Boise Classic Movies at the Egyptian Theater

boise classic movies
Source: Boise Classic Movies

I’m movie geek and fanatic, so when Boise Classic Movies released its holiday schedule, I screamed with joy. Maybe not scream, but definitely got giddy.

This year, the list of classic movies range from action to romcom to the classic holiday movies:

  • Love Actually
  • Christmas Vacation
  • It’s a Wonderful Life
  • Die Hard
  • A Christmas Story
  • Home Alone
  • White Christmas
  • Elf

Some of the movies showings include beer and wine (21+).  I believe these will all sell out, so grab your tickets early. Plus, you get to watch it in the coolest place here in Boise: The Egyptian Theater.


6. Ice Skating at the Village of Meridian

meridian ice skating Adam Eschabach MP
Source: Adam Eschabach/MP

Date: November through January 2018

I’ll admit — I’m not the best when it comes to ice skating. BUT for the holiday season, I’ll put on some ice skates.

The Village of Meridian now has an ice skating rink in Fountain Square. Its open from November thru January.  Ticket prices start at $5.00.

Enjoy a night of ice skating, then grab hot chocolate at Village Coffee, and sit by a warm fire.


7. Winter Garden aGlow at the Idaho Botanical Garden

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Source: Boise Bucket List/Instagram

Date: Thursday, November 23 – Monday, January 1; 6pm; Botanical Garden

The Garden isn’t only for the warm months. The Idaho Botanical Garden becomes a dazzling display of lights during the holiday season. Over 380K lights, to be exact.

On select nights, you can even see Santa and enjoy the sounds of local choirs.

Tickets start at $8, and children under 4 are FREE


8. Idaho Hot Springs

hot springs visit idaho
Source: Visit Idaho

Stay warm in one of Idaho’s hot springs. There a public and commercial options when choosing a hot spring. There are quite a few an hour or less from Boise:

The Springs Resort

Roy Stone Hot Springs

Little Anderson Hot Spring

If you’re willing to drive further, your options expand!


9. The Nutcracker at Ballet Idaho

ballet idaho morrison center
Source: Morrison Center

Date: Friday, December 15th and go through Sunday, December 17th. 

When I was growing up, my parents brought my siblings and me to see the Nutcracker. My sister especially loved it because she was into ballet. When I close my eyes and think of Christmas, seeing the Nutcracker is part of that vision.

Luck for us, we have a chance to see the Nutcracker live at Ballet Idaho.  This year, Ballet Idaho is hosting Nutcracker parties prior to each performance!

Snag your tickets early because these showings HAVE SOLD OUT! Not kidding.


10. Downtown Carriage Rides

horse carriage source stock photo
Source: Stock Photo

Date: Every Friday and Saturday from November 24th – December 16th, 4pm – 8pm

You’d think you’d have to travel to New York City to enjoy a classic carriage ride. Or, at least that’s what I see in the movies.

Starting in late November, you have the chance to enjoy a FREE carriage ride in downtown Boise. Yes, I said FREE.

Pickup is in front of the Washington Trust Bank 9th Street downtown Boise.


11. Boise Annual Holiday Concert

Holiday Concert, Photo By Wankun Sirichotiyakul
Source: Boise State University Music Department

Date: The concert is December 8th at 7:30pm. 

Let’s celebrate the season with Boise State University’s annual family holiday concert. The Boise State Music Department puts on this wonderful concert for all to enjoy.  BSU students, faculty & staff are eligible for free tickets. Non-BSU tickets start at $8


12. Claus N Paws Day at Zoo Boise

Source:Boise Bucket List/Instagram

Date: Saturday, December 2nd from 10am – 5pm

Want to have a fun FREE day at the zoo? On Saturday, December 2nd starting at 10am, you and your family can enjoy all the zoo offerings. Santa Claus will visit the zoo for photo ops.


13. Boise Holiday Parade

boise holiday parade source Downtown Boise
Source: Downtown Boise

Date: Saturday, November 18th starting at 9:45am

You can’t help but to enjoy a good, entertaining holiday parade. On Saturday, November 18th, come to downtown Boise and enjoy the “Storybook Christmas” at this year’s Boise annual Holiday Parade. The parade kicks off on Jefferson at 10th Street and heads to 4th Street.


 

14. Winter Wonderland in Downtown Caldwell

Date: Friday, November 17th from 6pm – 9pm. 

If you haven’t driven to Caldwell for its Winter Wonderland, you’re definitely missing out! I attended this last year, and I’m so happy the time has come where I can go again.  You have the beautiful light display  in downtown Caldwell. Lots of children activities, music, and plenty of vendors.


15. Elf the Musical at The Morrison Center

elf the musical source Morrison Center
Source: Morrison Center

Date: Shows start on Friday, December 1st and run through Saturday, December 2nd.  Tickets start at $35

Want to experience Broadway in Boise? As part of the 2017 – 2018 season, Elf the Broadway Musical will be playing at the Morrison Center. After you see the classic movie at the Egyptian Theater, head over to the Morrison Center to see the Broadway Musical!

 


16. Idaho State Capitol Christmas Tree Lighting

Date: Monday, November 27th

Source: Boise Bucket List/Instagram


Last year, I attended the Idaho State Capitol Christmas Tree lighting right after work, and it was absolutely worth it. There was free hot cocoa and cookies for everyone. After the tree lighting, you can head inside and explore the Idaho State Capitol building. Holiday decorations are something that’s magical – amazing, even. With the vibrant reds and the deep greens to the holiday wreaths, you can get lost in the sea of beautiful holiday decorations. The Idaho State Capitol building does not disappoint. The interior of the Capitol building is absolutely amazing!

 


Do you have any ideas of holiday festivities I should include on this list? Feel free to email me at theboisebucketlist@gmail.com for activities worth crossing off the #BoiseBucketList

 

Make sure to follow me on Instagram and use the hashtag #BoiseBucketList to share your stories of new adventures!

Dating in the BOI: Mr. Officer 

 

App: None

# of Dates: 2 (ish)

Status: No Contact


A few weeks ago,  I went to watch a football game at a local sports bar. I decided to smile more, be more approachable, and be open to small talk. I saw this so you can have some context.

Raised in south Florida — population heavily influenced with the sounds and beats of other cultures — I’ve been conditioned that when I go out, you don’t really smile. You may flirt with your eyes and a smirk, but it’s unlike a sports bar experience. What I learned last year, local bars are heavy on the small talk and beer flowing. I’m not saying it’s new to me given I lived in Portland, ME. But I don’t really hang out at sports bars.  But after asking people around where single locals hang out, I decided I had to step out my comfort zone.


My decision to step out my comfort zone included being more approachable, drinking “buds” and engaging in small talk. This time, it must have worked. I was outgoing, smiled, and ended up chatting with a tall, blue-eyed man with a pretty smile and a sense of humor. His way of breaking the ice was to joke that my friend took his seat. I played along with the joke, and before I knew it, my friend and I were sitting 3rd row, 50th yard line at the BSU game. I’ll admit – the game was so much fun, especially since my friend never been to a BSU game.


If you’re wondering, he had extra tickets because his date at the time cancelled last minute.

Insert violins.

Through our small talk conversation, he mentioned that he was a deputy sheriff. He even made a cute joke about “officer and lawyer” when I told him I went to law school.
After the game, my friend and I ended up back at the sports bar to find Mr. Officer to thank him for the tickets. Lo and behold, he was at the bar. Alone.

His friends decided to take the party on the road.


Mr. Officer, my friend and I decided to head downtown to grab something to eat. We originally wanted to go to The Reef, but to our dismay it was closed.


We ended up at Old Chicago for some late-night grub. I wasn’t in the mood for pizza, but I made it work. Toward the end of the night , Mr. Officer asked if we could “hang out” sometime and asked for my number. I smiled and without hesitation, gave him my number.

Sounds like a good story so far, right? Nothing crazy.


Well, except for him telling us that he is “fixed” and can’t have any more kids. He doesn’t want any more and rather date someone who already has kids.


Stop. Say what now?


Ummm.. first of all, too soon to mention that? Maybe. Even if not too soon, a lot during dinner. I don’t think we even got to the “ex” part of the conversation yet.


And secondly, I didn’t want to dive into whether I wanted children during that conversation. We were having fun, drinking, and eating. ( I do want children,  by the way. In case you were wondering).

I didn’t want to make that comment a big deal because I just met him and we had yet to go on our first date.


First Date Jitters

Because I didn’t meet him on Tinder or some other ridiculous app , I was legitimately nervous about my date. For those who have met me in-person, I’m outgoing and enjoy meeting people. But there are moments when I get shy. I mean shyyyyyyy. Like that I-need-to-look-away type of shy.  Mr. Officer suggested we go see It the Movie whenever I returned from my work trip.

Oohhh, scary movie for a first date? Yes I love it.

Oh c’mon , it’s ideal. You get to flinch and get close to your date. Which is exactly what I did. We first met at the Matador at the Village. Nothing like an adult beverage to calm your nerves. Soon thereafter, we headed over to the movie theater to get our seats. Mr. Officer was a gentleman and paid, for both the drinks and the movie tickets.

Aside from It being a strange and creepy movie, I’d said the first date was a success.


During the week prior to our movie date, and afterwards toward my birthday, he kept texting me.

Asking me when I was going to Vegas for work because he wouldn’t mind joining me.

Asking me if I ever been to Haunted World because we could go together.

Asking me if I ever been to Jackpot, NV  for gambling.

Asking me how my day was at work.

If you haven’t caught on, he would do nothing but ask me about future plans and seemed eager to do them together.

Again – nothing is weird with this dating story so far, right? You’re probably thinking

Diana…c’mon now. Get to the good stuff.

Fine, you got it!


Never Been With A  ___________ Before

Disclaimer: the next few sections I’m going to be talking about my own experiences in Boise that I haven’t spoken about in my dating blogs. I didn’t feel the need to because I wanted to keep my blog posts entertaining. But I think with this recent dating experience,  it’s fair to shed light on a few things.

On my birthday, Mr. Officer offered to meet me at one of the local bars for a birthday drink. He ended up meeting me at Hannah’s and bought me a drink. He was out with friends to watch BSU play. All was fine & dandy until he started talking about how he never lived outside of Idaho. He probably won’t anytime soon given his custody arrangement with his ex-wife.

Not strange at all. I know plenty of people who lived in one state all their life. 

Little did I know that this comment was leading to another statement of how he never been with (which he later corrected by saying “hung out with”) a woman of color. He said “black girl” then again corrected himself and said “Spanish woman.”


Hmmm….what to say to that?

My only way to respond was with oh yeah? That’s interesting. he continued to say that he always liked women of different backgrounds but Boise didn’t really have much when he was growing up. I thought

Ok, good to know. I appreciate your candor and honesty.


The conversation stayed on race for a little longer. He asked me if I dated outside my race, and I laughed saying I’m from south Florida, where it’s a melting pot.  I directly answered by saying yes, I dated someone who is white.  Fortunately, the conversation shifted when a song came on (Despacito, no less).


Before I knew it, it was time for me to head home. My brother (fortunately) met me at Tom Grainey’s and we walked to our car.


Here’s the thing: I understand that I don’t live in South Florida. I’m cognizant of where I live. I lived in New England where diversity is not as prominent as West Palm Beach, Florida.  Despite this awareness, it’s not always easy to deal with certain uncomfortable situations:

  • My curly hair has been “patted” and touched like I’m a cat. A man while leaving a bar stroked my head and said it’s so soft like my cat’s fur
  • I was minding my business at a local bar (I won’t mention where), when I felt someone grab my right arm forcing me to dance with him to Despacito (I guess this song is an open invitation to dance with anyone who looks Hispanic because of course we want to dance to it). Rather than acknowledging that he startled me, he whispered in my ear that I need to relax and that he wasn’t like every “corny white guy” in Boise.
  • Could I cross off being with a black girl off his bucket list? (no, this is not a joke)
  • Being told that he voted for Obama and does that qualify him to make me want to date him. Soon after asking me that, he dropped an entire PBR on my leg with no intention of picking it up.
  • Constantly told how exotic I look (I guess it’s a compliment, but not when it’s repeated over and over by the same person and the inappropriate time & place).
  • Never seen a black girl with freckles before

I say this because I want to give you some context to what I have to say next. It’s not like I haven’t been told something similar to what I’ve mentioned before. It just seems to me it’s been happening more frequently than I’d like. For those who are open-minded when it comes to dating, please understand this. If you meet someone from another race or ethnicity from yours, and they are showing interest, I don’t think it’s wise to start off any  any discussion about “have you been with a ________ before?” Unless the person asks. If I asked Mr. Officer whether he’s dating/talked to someone outside his race, I’m curious and want to have a discussion with it.  I’m only speaking from my experience, but that type of comment makes the person uncomfortable.


And this goes two ways. My 2nd serious boyfriend in my life is white. He is 6’4, with deep blue eyes, and surfer tan skin. He was also raised in Naperville, IL and apparently raised around all types of cultures/races. That said, when I first met him, I kept saying comments in a joking way like I never dated a white guy before or you must like mixed girls if you’re talking to me.

I’m cringing as I write these comments because I can’t believe I said that.


My ex finally said something and told me it made him uncomfortable when I said those comments. It made him feel as though race was a big part of our relationship. I failed to realize he constantly thought he wasn’t good enough because of his race. Or he felt insecure when we would be out in public (yes, even in Fort Lauderdale, FL).  I didn’t need to add to his feelings by making my own insensitive comments, regardless if a joke or not.


I was younger, of course, but I learned a valuable lesson then. That lesson is what I brought with me to Portland, ME. I ended up having some weird situations while I lived there too. But the situations were few and far between.


 

Fast-forward to now, I don’t talk to Mr. Officer anymore. He did text me apologizing for being MIA because he’s been sick. And I got some random SnapChat photo of his groin area (he was wearing jeans). He immediately messaged me saying “Sorry, my SnapChat is acting up.”  My brother thinks it was mistake photo, but still.

Weird.

 


 

I’m taking a break from dating in Boise. I truly am. I have so much more positive elements in my life to focus on  that dating isn’t a priority. At least not in Boise. If I end up going on a date, I need for him to “wow” me. Make me stop in my tracks. Impress me with his desire to spend time & get to know me. Until then, I highly doubt I’ll have any dating stories to share in the near future. Don’t worry – I’ll have some fun Dating in the BOI stories to share that are not mine. I’ll even host some Dating in the BOI activities.

But as for me, I’m signing off as the primary dating blogger.

 

 

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